Before I start, you should know that I am using voice recognition on my phone. I am not typing on my PC like I usually would be. There might be some mistakes.

Content warning for narcissism, abuse, neglect, ableism, medical issues, mention of opioids

I really wanted to avoid making a post like this. I am speaking on my phone while I recover from my recent health crisis. Unfortunately, something extremely significant came up and I need to make a post right now to inform anyone who may be concerned.

I tried to use the computer last night. It turns out I pushed myself farther than I could handle. I caused my arms to experience a lot more pain, especially my right arm. It was bad enough I needed to use an opioid. I tried anti-inflammatory cream but it just made it worse. And the pain has continued all throughout the day. I had to keep my arm incredibly still or else it would explode into pain.

I was able to handle today mostly fine. The problem started in the evening. You see, I need to take you back for this story.

Late last year, my house went under renovations because of my mom. In November, I noticed that the new air conditioning unit had caused some kind of change. I was getting migraines just from breathing indoors. I was desperate to find a solution and discovered if I changed a setting in the air conditioner, the air became breathable and I was fine. For some reason, the setting kept on turning itself off. So over and over again, I had to turn it on. Thankfully, it wasn't too hard. But I would always know if I needed to turn it on because I would suddenly get the start of migraine.

This continued for five months until today. It turned out my brother was the one changing the air conditioning. I got a sudden message from him while minding my own business, telling me to stop touching their conditioning. I told him I need the air conditioning this high for my migraines. He told me the house is extremely humid because of this. I told him there's nothing I can do I need this help. He insinuated that my migraines don't make sense.

Then my mom got involved. I had no choice but to contact her. I told her about the situation. The first thing she did was insinuate. I had not tried hard enough. She told me I need to try using the fans in my room or Drink more water. She asked to see where the setting was in the AFTA controls that are conditioning, but I also heard her footsteps outside. I have a fear response anytime I hear her footsteps outside my room, so I seized up. I texted her to not come here and I would send her a screenshot.

There were more sounds outside my room. Then they stopped. My mom disappeared from the text messages. I was left wondering what happened. My brother had turned the air conditioning Down earlier and I was quickly beginning to feel migraine forming. I texted my mom asking to please respond because I can't take much more of this. She took me back. Finally, she told me I could turn the air conditioning back up and drink some water and she will decide what to do.

As I waited, thoughts raced through my head. My migraines really do not make sense. I mean, how could a migraine be caused by turning down the air conditioner? I've lived with Daily migraines, since I was a child, until i was roughly 23 i think. I know for a fact these migraines are real and I went to a neurologist last year who was unable to help me. Why is my family unaffected? Why was our previous air conditioner fine, but this new model gives me migraines when it is not on full blast?

So the secret was out. Now that my brother and I knew we were both touching the air conditioning controls, I could not keep the air conditioner the way I needed it. I knew that as soon as mom returned I would need to kiss her up to her in order to ensure that by any means i can get relief from the migraines. I prepared myself mentally and waited.

When I saw her, the first thing she asked me was if I had been drinking water today. I realized then that I would have to lie. I told her I had been drinking what I believe was a healthy amount. She insisted that it's not enough. Then she brought up the air conditioner. She told me that 70% humidity in the house is too much. This is when I realized that she was just talking to my brother because he gave me the same number. It's also when I realized I lost her. You see, I told her about the setting in the air conditioner controls a few days ago. She believed it was good because she is having allergies this season. But now she was repeating exactly what my brothers said because they talked behind my back

She mentioned if there's a setting between the two modes in the air conditioner, we can use that. But she did not mention any intention of finding out more or looking for other options to help me. I followed her to the kitchen where she immediately Ask me if I have been eating enough. This is another trigger for me as I have an eating disorder she hurts me over. I again lied and said yes. To my surprise, she did not press the issue. Then she handed me two plastic bags with fabric inside. She suddenly started telling me that I need to try on these new shirts to replace the "falling apart" crop top I've been wearing.

Yes, my crop top has a hole in it. It's very small. Nobody has ever complained about it except for her. She thinks it's a big deal. When I saw this, I was feeling mad. It took everything to hold back my anger. She has a very bad habit of Buying things without telling me and forcing them on me. I have told her a dozen times This is over the line.

But I held strong. I took them and nodded to her. She continued. She took a bottle I didn't recognize from the cabinet. She told me these will help with my migraines. It's over the counter, medication. She asked what I do when I have a migraine. I told her Nothing helps. She told me to just drink some water and go to bed. When I mentioned that drinking water does not help, she suddenly interrupted and said louder, I don't care, drink it anyway, maybe you're wrong.

Maybe all of this does not sound that bad to you, but she has a very special way of probing my weak points. I left that conversation feeling extremely unstable. I called a dear friend of mine on Discord who helps to keep me grounded in my time of need.But I noticed partway through the call, my brother had already turned the air conditioning back down. Even now that I've made it known I have migraines because of this I began to despair knowing that I will have a migraine every day from now on until I find a solution.

I did my best to quickly come up with a plan. Tomorrow, I am going to call my doctor and ask for help with migraines. As well, my friend helped me find a simple combination dehumidifier and air purifier on Amazon. I ordered it to arrive ASAP. If all goes well, it should be easy to maintain.

While I was talking to him I grabbed a snack but I noticed the signs of my migraine worsening in the same way it did when I was going to school. increasing pressure in the head, throbbing pain, heat. Neck tenderness and difficulty speaking. dizziness, nausea, trouble focusing. Everyday is going to be like this now.

There is one last saving grace for me, though. I have a box I have been maintaining full of leftover medications for a long time, in case I was abandoned by doctors. I have several bottles of opioids. It may not last forever, but it can help me through. In my experience, relieve pain but cause a great amount of dizziness.

It's hard to maintain hope right now. I am in a very difficult place in my life. There are not only many physical issues plaguing me, but social ones in my personal life. And now, issues at home are causing me direct harm. This could not have happened at a worse time. I am on so much medication right now that it was helpful to stop HRT for the moment. Even today, I had to use my phone with one arm, switching between arms every hour as they became sore.

I am also considering using my car. If I stay inside, even if I am wasting gas, it has better air conditioning than the house and I will at least have less of a migraine.

Desperate times, call for desperate measures.